A Rustic Backyard Concept

Finding the perfect reception venue is probably the second most difficult thing marrying couples deal with, next to where to hold the ceremony. Some couples, particularly those who belong to other religions, have the privilege to hold their reception exactly where they hold their ceremony. But for Catholics who are not allowed to exchange vows outside the church, it’s a whole different story.

There are countless hotels and restaurants in Tagaytay that are highly sought and recommended by wedding magazines, wedding websites, and well-reputed wedding planners. But though it’s ideal that we book our reception in one of those fairytale-worthy places, they’re not even in our options.

We’re thinking of a relaxed backyard luncheon, where people would just be talking the whole afternoon over good food and lemonades instead of dancing the night away. We also had to consider the fact that not everyone will have their own transportation, so we had to make sure that everyone can get home safe and sound after the wedding.

Initially, our plan was to hold the reception in the fiance’s Tagaytay backyard. This option will not only help us achieve a relaxed ambiance for the reception, but will also save us a huge portion of our budget. We simply can’t imagine spending Php 70-90k on venues that will be rented out for 5 hours, especially since it will take most of us at least 5 months to earn that amount of money. Maybe for other couples, the price is just right. For us, definitely wrong.

Here are some photos of the backyard:

SKID MARKS: the pickup got stuck in the mud. LOL

It still looks like it needs a little manicuring but once it undergoes a makeover, it can comfortably room about 120-150 guests. We’re still considering the possibility of holding our reception to a different venue, but for now, it’s the backyard that we’re really eyeing on.

The Day When I Realized Why Wedding Gowns Cost A Fortune

I don’t quite get why wedding gowns would cost so much when a similar beaded Cinderella gown would not cost a fortune if it’s in a different color.

 I’m not a hundred percent sure if I should be blogging about this story but I think it’s still worth sharing. There’s this one up and coming designer who makes wedding gowns for Php 20-40k. I went to her one time and brought my dress peg to show her. I just wanted to see how much she’s going to quote me. One major detail though: I posed as a maid of honor. So technically, I was inquiring for a maid of honor dress.

I had to see how much the dress would cost IF I’m not the bride. She drew something that looked like an ankle-length Kate Middleton dress and quoted me Php5k for the labor (fabric would come from me). It didn’t want beadworks, so it was a real simple dress with some lace details. Though I had to compose myself every time she would wonder why I’m having something in ecru/ivory, it’s still worth snooping around. Because of that I learned how much I should be willing to spend for my wedding dress – that Php20k would be too much.

I almost booked her right there and then because I got excited about how cheap I’m going to get my dress made. But I realized that the designer was more concerned about me not getting in the way of the “real bride”. She wanted to make sure that I won’t steal the limelight. In short, I came there as a maid of honor, and left her shop feeling like a real one. I didn’t feel like a bride. And it’s a feeling that I’ll never be able to experience and forever regret if I push through with it.

I know there are a lot of factors that contribute to the high price of wedding gowns--- there’s the materials, the workmanship, the “uniqueness” of the design, and whatnot. I never knew how to justify why wedding dresses are so expensive until I realized that it’s not just the dress that I’m paying for---I’m also paying for all the pressures of those once-in-a-lifetime thingamajigs that designers have to deal with, and for the emotions that I should feel once I try the dress on.

I called off the project with the designer and, luckily, I found a good one who quoted me Php 5k for the labor. This time though, the designer knows that I’m the bride, and I trust that she’ll make me feel and look really pretty on my wedding day.

Do guys really have to put a ring on it?

The Ring

I'm pretty sure a lot of couples would not agree with me on this, but as much as I want to find reasons why engagement rings are not necessary, it's kind of hard.

And I don't want to assert that such accessories are a must either, because at the end of the day, it will all depend on the couple. But personally though, I would like to quote Beyonce:

"If you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it"

Even though engagement rings can be considered as materialistic representations of a superficially perfect love affair, they actually represent a lot of things. For one, it's the time bomb that reminds the couple how far out their big day is. It's like the moment the guy slips the ring into the girl's finger, the real planning starts. I know there are couples who still don't have a plan even if they get engaged, but they're probably part of the exception.

Second, engagement rings are a sign that the guy is ready, not only to spend the rest of his life with the girl, but also to take responsibility of what the future holds for them . Now unless the girl is willing to pay for everything and provide a sustainable living for her future family, engagements rings are not really necessary. But that's unlikely.

Lastly, engagement rings can take regular boyfriend-girlfriend relationships up another notch. They set a period to rethink the whole relationship and see whether the couple are really meant to take the big leap. They separate the couple from other couples who are "taking their time". Trust me, I know some couples who are "engaged", but because they don't have an engagement story, I couldn't tell if they're settling down any time soon. When you have a ring on, you know that your shit just got serious.

All I'm saying is, engagement rings, or whatever accessory that represents your engagement are necessary---it's the expensive, unrealistic ones that aren't.